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Campus Wars USA: Across the US, a battle is raging on university campuses over freedom of speech as students divided by the conflict in Gaza fight for their voices to be heard. [SL.

Jamie Oliver shows us how to cook the ultimate spaghetti vongole.

In Kent, Iain and Miranda uncover some pricey problems. Andrew and Mandy upcycle a dining table, while Lucy and Seb finally make a breakthrough after months of delays.

Colin Murray and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. Les Dennis joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner.

See Dick Continue to Run, Continued: As Evil Dick attempts to seduce Mary Albright, the other aliens help the real Dick to escape from his prison.

Hotel Dick: Appalled by the treatment of aliens in a hit movie, the Solomons attend a sci-fi convention to set the record straight. Sally gets hooked on room service.

Big Angry Virgin from Outer Space: Sally and Mr Randell's relationship comes under pressure, but Dick's idea that sex will solve all their problems is no help.

The Dog: Ray and Robert both want to keep a stray bulldog that Ray brings home. But it turns out that the canine isn't so stray after all..

Neighbors: Ray's neighbours demand a meeting at his house to discuss what to do about his noisy dad Frank and interfering mum Marie. But then Frank and Marie arrive.

Fascinatin' Debra: A psychotherapist interviews Debra for an article on the American family but finds the rest of the Barones more interesting than her.

Dial M for Martin: Frasier's unemployed status puts him on edge with everyone and, when he blows up at Martin, Roz suggests that Martin moves in with Niles.

Hot Ticket: Frasier and Niles fail to get tickets to the hottest show in town, and Daphne's behind appears in the Seattle paper.

First, Do No Harm: Frasier undertakes huge projects to make up for being unemployed, while Martin persuades him to date Duke's daughter Marie.

Vets and volunteers rescue and rehabilitate animals in South Africa. Emily oversees a tricky giraffe capture and Emma releases six rehabilitated animals back into the wild.

Channel 4's midday news summary.

In Almería, the Garners have their work cut out to tick everything off Gary and Michaela's long wish list. And in Málaga, the Hamiltons help Andy and Angie find their dream home.

In Newark, Simon O'Brien finds an antique European threshing board, which he turns into a coffee table, and Henry Cole's all at sea with a ship's porthole.

Colin Murray and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. Les Dennis joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner.

Maria and Paul dream of owning a home away from home among the Andalusian countryside, to escape the English winters. Can Craig Rowe find 'the one' for their budget of £270k.

A couple take on a massive property in France, a business exec gives it all up to run a farm in the Italian mountains and two Londoners fall in love with a rundown hotel in Spain.

Helen and Matt create a stunning room in homage to Napoleon and a mural based on Caravaggio's painting of Cupid. Tim and Rebecca finish the first floor of their gîte renovation.

The new run continues. This week's competition kicks off in Llandudno, where host Jo and her mum Pat end up with some illuminating feedback about their guests' lack of sleep.

The Crepes of Wrath: Bart goes on a foreign exchange to France, where he stays with a couple of slave-driving wine makers.

Channel 4's flagship news programme. Including the weather.

More air-fryer fare flair with Jamie Oliver, including chicken and mushroom pastry parcels, charred veg and fluffy flatbread and a lusciously-layered choccy burnt cheesecake.

...Detectives: A brutal murder on a Scottish nature reserve is investigated by specialist forensics cops using groundbreaking techniques to help identify the possible suspects.

The trauma team rush to help a man who's fallen headlong down a remote hillside. A woman has a serious chainsaw cut. And a motorcyclist has crashed at high speed on the motorway.

Brighton's cops deal with more party-time trouble. Runaway youths send action-loving Andrzej on a wild goose chase. Junior officer Jake tackles a baseball-bat-wielding suspect.

All the Missing Girls: Documentary. Parents accuse Kelly of keeping their daughters psychologically and sexually imprisoned. One mother fights to get her daughter back - and wins.

Gordon Ramsay visits the struggling Historic Calumet Inn in Pipestone, Minnesota, where the staff are working at full stretch and are on the brink of revolt. [SL.

Homer's Night Out: Homer's in trouble when Bart captures him on film cavorting with belly dancer Princess Kashmir.

Million Dollar Abie: Grampa costs Springfield the chance of getting a major football team. So he starts a new life as a bullfighter.

In Nottingham, Karen and Nigel cook Bajan cuisine, Beth and Clem deliver fine dining with a celebrity twist, and Jo and Charlie serve up Greek grub and some potentially explosive surprises. [SL.

When Rob and Sally buy land in Mystery Bay, NSW, there are challenges. The home must withstand the elements, have amazing views and blend into the surroundings.

Iain and Miranda learn some new skills and give their former rectory a much-needed facelift. And in Somerset, Sarah wants to create a magical bedroom for her young boys.

The campers visit Higher Moor Farm, where the 2012 Olympic spirit lives on. They take part in a pasty bake-off and go sailing in Weymouth. Is this the Jurassic Coast's perfect pitch.

Can Kirstie Allsopp and her team help Louise turn her dilapidated Essex flat into a peaceful paradise without breaking the bank.

Colin Murray and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. Les Dennis joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner.

Much Ado About Dick: When Mary Albright is afraid to be seen with Dick in public as a couple, the Solomons find out about the human obsession with what other people think.

Dick the Vote: Harry runs for a seat on the city council after he is mistaken for a political activist by the media, leading Dick to discover the democratic system's complexity.

Fourth and Dick: Dick learns about the importance humans place on competition in the run-up to the homecoming weekend sports match. Tommy gets a crush on his Glee Club teacher.

Why Are We Here?: Ray and Debra reminisce about more peaceful times in their first apartment and recall why they ended up living across the road from Ray's meddlesome parents.

Ray's on TV: Ray's family reluctantly tell him the truth about his performance after he appears as a panellist on TV.

Father Knows Least: Ray reluctantly accompanies Debra to parenting classes but soon realises that he can use the lessons on his own parents.

Secret Admirer: Frasier mistakenly thinks that he has a secret admirer while he's dating an attractive new woman.

How to Bury a Millionaire: Niles has to move in with Frasier after his divorce leaves him strapped for cash.

The Seal Who Came to Dinner: While hosting a dinner party for The Gourmet Society at Maris's beach house, Frasier and Niles have to deal with a smelly, washed-up seal carcass.

Vets and volunteers rescue and rehabilitate animals in South Africa. Annie and Will move an infamous pride of lions, and Josie introduces some blind monkeys to their new home.

Channel 4's midday news summary.

In Alicante, the Rodriguez sisters search with hustle-and-bustle-loving Emma and Elwyn, while the Garners help Lee and Tony find their first home together in Almería.

Simon O'Brien converts tank parts into garden furniture, and Henry Cole takes his life in his hands with a motorised skateboard. Plus: a model Hurricane and a retro petrol pump.

Colin Murray and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. Les Dennis joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner.

When Anne and Gordon met, they discovered a mutual love of travelling, and now they dream of buying a holiday home in Kefalonia. Can Danni Menzies find them the perfect place for £200k.

In Andalucía, it's launch day at a couple's new hotel. In France, two gîte owners are dealt a financial blow. And in Italy, an injury puts a group of organic farmers under strain.

Lee and Belinda make some rustic shelves to complete their kitchen. At Château de Saugé, Donna and Paul start work on demolishing a wall and removing a staircase in their salon.

The new run continues at The Queens Hotel in Harlech. Rachel and professional impersonator Liam are keen to make a good impression. But one B&Ber has a sinking feeling.

Krusty Gets Busted: Krusty is accused of robbing the Kwik-E-Mart. But Bart is convinced that his hero is innocent and, with Lisa's help, sets out to prove it.

Channel 4's flagship news programme. Including the weather.

It all gets a bit Wonka as six confectioners pitch to get their sweet treats through Aldi's doors. Will it be the toffee with a twist or a chocolate that makes you more beautiful.

In the centre of Brighton, a lone officer is violently attacked and urgently needs back up. And a disorientated drunk going home to bed tries smashing his way into the wrong house.

In this explosive new dating show, singles shack up with not one but two love interests. Will feelings flourish when Jasmine, Lloyd and Mike meet their matches.

The new series continues. What do Britain's sharpest armchair critics think of the biggest and best shows on TV? [SL.

The contestants are forced to wrangle wild animals, with unpleasant results for Steve Pemberton and Sophie Willan. Plus: pickled onions, and a controversial cardboard tube. [SL.

Joe Lycett hosts his raucous comedy entertainment show, live from his hometown of Birmingham, with madcap games, celebrity guests, local heroes and, of course, Joe's aunties.

The four pianists prepare for the final - to play before a packed house at the Royal Festival Hall. Who will deliver the winning performance? And will there be a last twist on the night? [SL.

Claudia Winkleman hosts the full final concert of The Piano at the Royal Festival Hall, featuring performances by Lang Lang, Mika and the 2023 finalists. [SL.

David and Jenny dream of living in a super-modern terrace in Melbourne. But their plan to create a three-storey home pushes their stress levels and finances.

Sarah and Nick begin an ambitious project, while Mandy and Andrew discover a secret in their dining room. And Lucy and Seb deal with severe delays to their Georgian renovation.

Kirstie Allsopp helps Hannah and Andy transform their suburban semi into a wonderland.

Colin Murray and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. Les Dennis joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner.

World's Greatest Dick: Dick forces a reluctant Tommy to attend a special school for gifted students. Sally is mistaken for a drag queen, while Harry learns how to do magic tricks.

My Mother the Alien: Dick discovers that he lacks nurturing skills when he accidentally kills Mary Albright's pet fish while she is away at a conference.

Gobble, Gobble, Dick, Dick: The aliens are puzzled by the Thanksgiving holiday, but they invite Mrs Dubcek and her daughter to their first celebration.

Brother: Ray agrees to take Robert out on the anniversary of his divorce but is disturbed by the brotherly bonding that develops.

Mozart: To teach Ally a lesson about quitting, Ray resumes the piano lessons with his mother that he gave up 25 years earlier.

Golf: Ray's guilt about lying to Debra so that he can play golf turns into stress, for which his doctor prescribes a surprising cure.

Roz, a Loan: Unemployed Roz is happy to hear that KACL might be rehiring everyone.

Merry Christmas, Mrs. Moskowitz: A friendly woman comes to Frasier's rescue when he is out Christmas shopping. She recognises him, and he offers to return the favour.

The Good Samaritan: Frasier is arrested after unwittingly giving a ride to a prostitute. To make matters worse, he must explain the public scandal to his 11-year-old son.

Vets and volunteers rescue and rehabilitate animals in South Africa. Harriet's on a mission to save three naughty elephants and Debbie deals with six escapee baby monkeys.

Channel 4's midday news summary.

The Rodriguezes catch up with Marsha and Adrian who wanted to put down coastal roots, and the Garners find out how Arthur and Melanie are settling into Spanish life.

Henry Cole and Simon O'Brien visit a private railway, where Simon transforms a lantern into a stylish table, and Henry converts a fire extinguisher into a steampunk lamp.

Colin Murray and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. Les Dennis joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner.

Motorbike lovers Carol and Mark dream of owning a holiday home in El Campello on the Costa Blanca. With a budget of £130k, will any of Laura Hamilton's properties get them revved up.

A B&B owner swaps Brighton for the Costa del Sol, stormy weather halts a couple's gîte renovations in France, and a new idea gets off to a bumpy start on an organic farm in Italy.

Helen and Matt create an elaborate ceiling for their bridal suite. Just months into their chateau adventure, Anna and Philipp start the digging for a huge hedge around the grounds.

The new run continues. The B&Bers are at Mat and Helen's B&B in Carmarthenshire for the week's third visit, where things get prickly during a visit to a botanical garden.

Some Enchanted Evening: Bart becomes convinced that his childminder is the Babysitter Bandit.

Channel 4's flagship news programme. Including the weather.

...Renovations: Stuart and Theresa were ready to downsize for retirement... until they saw a village hall ripe for renovation. With their son's wedding looming, did they finish it.

...Renovation Rescue: A dad and daughter's hopes for a fresh start in Suffolk after a bereavement were dashed by bad building work. Can they finish their build on a tighter budget.

The brokers at UK Sotheby's International Realty are back, securing more multi-million-pound sales. Can Lee find a buyer for a £29m house overlooking Regents Park lake.

Our first couples settle into their new love nests, but is it domestic bliss for all? And three new singles - ZaraLena, Dan and Danika - pick their partners.

Builder Frank, who's 63, has fallen from height. While his daughter tells of her dad's many sacrifices, a teenager who's been hit by a car arrives with possible brain injuries.

The last of the fugitives head to London for extraction details. But in one of the most watched cities in the world, home of Hunter HQ, will anyone make it out to win the £100k? [SL.

Fiat X1/9: Tim Shaw and Fuzz Townshend take on a Fiat X1/9. It needs work, but owner Steve, who has terminal cancer, desperately wants to see his son drive it.

(2020) Dystopian pandemic sci-fi produced by Michael Bay. What would society be like if Covid-19 had mutated into an even more deadly killer? Strong language/sex/violence/upsetting scenes. [SL.

Matt and Eloise leave Melbourne for Tasmania, but the budget for their Tamar build means Matt must do most of the work. And injury and pregnancy add to the chaos.

In Bristol, Phil helps Josh and Anna, who want a place of their own, while Kirstie has a tricky search with Sue and Samira, whose budget falls short of their requirements.

Colin Murray and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. Les Dennis joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner.

Dick Jokes: Dick is jealous when Mary Albright asks another professor to host a college fundraiser she's organising because he is more witty.

Jolly Old St. Dick: As the Solomons prepare for their first Christmas, Sally gets a job wrapping presents at the shopping centre, while Harry is employed as Santa's assistant.

Proud Dick: When Dick's pride gets the better of him over a parking space problem at work, he quits his university job and gets a position at a fast-food restaurant.

Anniversary: At Frank and Marie's anniversary party, Ray feels guilty that his parents split up for a year and only got back together after Ray fell off his bike.

Working Late Again: Debra convinces Ray to give working from home a try, but things don't turn out as she had planned.

The Children's Book: Ray's competitive side emerges when Debra invites him to help her write some children's books for Ally.

Our Parents, Ourselves: Frasier plays Cupid when he arranges a supposedly accidental meeting between Martin and Roz's mother.

The Show Where Woody Shows Up: Frasier receives a surprise visit from Woody (guest star Woody Harrelson), his old friend from the Cheers bar in Boston.

Three Valentines: Niles prepares for a Valentine's date at Frasier's apartment, until a crease in his trousers escalates into a series of calamities.

Vets and volunteers rescue and rehabilitate animals in South Africa. Alison prepares to release an endangered penguin. Emily anaesthetises a cheetah that needs to go to a new home.

Channel 4's midday news summary.

In Almería, the Garners hunt for a home with a breathtaking view for Paul and Breda. And in Alicante, can Charlotte rise to the occasion to find keen baker Peter a perfect place.

Max McMurdo restores a pair of iconic designer chairs, while Henry Cole transforms a decrepit garden table into a colourful and valuable new one.

Colin Murray and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. Les Dennis joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner.

Retirees Annette and Malcom are ready to embark on a new adventure in Almería, Spain, where they can soak up the winter sun. Leah Charles-King shows them what their £200k can buy.

There's a problem at some holiday lets on the Costa del Sol, farmers in Italy launch a new venture, a hotelier plans his first wedding and two gîte owners in France get creative.

Helen and Matt get ready to open Château la Briance to guests on Valentine's Day, and Donna and Paul get creative with their cornicing, as they finally complete their guest salon.

The new run continues. The week's final visit is to Lesley and Sarah's Hideaway Escapes in Pembrokeshire, where one set of guests decide to sleep in their car rather than their room.

The Serfsons: In a fantasy world, the peasant Simpsons struggle with Marge's mother's illness. And Lisa's magic powers lead to her capture.

Channel 4's flagship news programme. Including the weather.

In Essex, the team rush to help a trapped badger. A fox club has got its head stuck in a rusty wheel. And a nest of orphaned chicks are found in an ashtray on an industrial site.

Steve Pemberton experiments with G-force, Sophie Willan splatters a human pigeon and Joanne McNally rocks a traffic cone. In other news, Nick Mohammed gets trapped under a bed.

...Holidays: Joe Wilkinson and Katherine Ryan show us how to have fabulously affordable getaways. In Norfolk, they leap through lavender fields and go boat tripping on the Broads.

All six couples come together at a drinks party, where a scandal rocks the group. But there's an even bigger shock when they learn about an unexpected comeback..

...Detectives: A brutal murder on a Scottish nature reserve is investigated by specialist forensics cops using groundbreaking techniques to help identify the possible suspects. [SL.

(2018) Intense biographical drama starring Jamie Bell as a Neo-Nazi skinhead who decides to leave his racist beliefs behind. Strong language & violence/racist insults/sex/drugs.

In and around Nottingham, there's amusing relationship advice, strong opinions, a traditional Indian banquet and a home-grown menu, as three couples put their hosting skills to the test. [SL.

Perth couple Angelo and Kasi love the bulky concrete buildings from the 50s. But when they see the plans for their new family home, there are a few surprises.

In the South East, Kirstie Allsopp helps Tom and Kaitlyn, whose wish list doesn't match their budget. Phil Spencer's with Pete and Georgie, who are desperate for more space.

Colin Murray and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. Les Dennis joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner.

Romeo & Juliet & Dick: When Tommy asks Dick to direct his high school production of Romeo and Juliet, Dick takes the job a little too seriously.

Guilty as Dick: While doing a favour for Mary Albright, Dick sprains his ankle and discovers the power of guilt when she feels bad about him being in pain.

Dick on One Knee: Sally's French friend Michel asks her to marry him so he can stay in the US. As the wedding plans take shape, Tommy finds he has a talent for flower arranging.

The Gift: Ray buys his dad an expensive aquarium, just like the one in the Chinese restaurant, for his 65th birthday. At first Frank loves it, but then one fish dies..

High School: Ray accompanies Debra to a high school reunion, where he is unmasked as a former nerd. Worse still, Debra was one of the cool kids who used to tease him.

The Letter: Debra decides to write a letter to Marie to tell her to stop interfering after ruining her Tupperware party, but a shocked Ray tries to intercept the note.

To Tell the Truth: Niles hires Donny (Saul Rubinek), a legal shark and Roz's ex-boyfriend, to represent him in the divorce case.

Decoys: Niles discovers that Daphne is dating Donny, his divorce attorney, so he hatches a plan to get Donny back together with Roz.

Dinner Party: Frasier and Niles decide to throw a dinner party but can't agree on who they should invite.

Vets and volunteers rescue and rehabilitate animals in South Africa. Anna dehorns two rare and dangerous black rhinos. Jenna and Sean tackle the issue of human and elephant conflict.

Channel 4's midday news summary.

In Almería, can the Garners find Jolene a home near to her best friend Andrea's? In Murcia, Darren and Natalie are hoping for top marks from retired teachers Naomi and Tony.

Henry Cole and Simon O'Brien turn an old, unloved filing cabinet into a valuable and desirable storage unit, and convert a Bakelite voltmeter into a retro Bluetooth speaker.

Colin Murray and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. Les Dennis joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner.

Ben Hillman helps Shirley and Martyn look for a holiday home with traditional French features in their favourite village of Monpazier. But can they find their perfect place for £285k.

A former B&B owner launches tapas walking tours in Spain, it's the busiest day of the year for some farmers in Italy, and the pressure is on for a hotelier's first wedding.

Anna and Philipp discover some unwanted wildlife in their chimney, and Erin and JB create a beautiful bedroom for JB's sister in the west turret of their moated chateau.

The new run continues. On a feisty payment day, the B&Bers tackle everything from bathroom blues to one set of guests completely refusing to try out one of their rivals' rooms.

Springfield Splendor: Lisa and Marge team up on a graphic novel that becomes a musical. But Marge takes all the credit..

Channel 4's flagship news programme. Including the weather.

Haiti: Pregnant and on the Run: As pregnant women flee war-torn Haiti, reporter Guillermo Galdos discovers an immigration crackdown at neighbouring Dominican Republic's hospital doors.

Bill samples the laid-back red-dirt lifestyle, goes swimming with friendly whale sharks and visits the awesome Pink Lakes. There are also wild emus - and they're hungry.

As the new series continues, what did the Goggleboxers make of this week's top TV.

Joe Lycett presides over the mischief and mayhem as he presents his comedy entertainment show, live from Birmingham, with celeb guests, local heroes and, of course, Joe's aunties.

(2012) Adult comedy. Sequel to American Pie, with Jason Biggs, Alyson Hannigan and Seann William Scott. The class of 1999 gather to reminisce and misbehave. Strong language/sex/nudity.

(2022) Bloody horror. Adult filmmakers inexplicably choose a ramshackle house in the Bible-Belt wilderness to shoot a porn film. It's gonna get nasty. Drugs/strong language/sex/nudity.

VW Wizard: Tim Shaw and Fuzz Townshend come to the rescue of their first ever custom car - a radically modified VW Beetle called a VW Wizard.

...Special: Five Paralympic stars take on the culinary competition. Can dressage champion Natasha Baker ride off with the prize with her winter warmers.

...Special: On day two, judoka Chris Skelley's menu confuses one guest, while his starter impresses another. But what do they think of his rendition of a karaoke classic.

...Special: Paralympic presenter Arthur Williams goes all out with an international menu featuring fondue from Switzerland, nasi goreng from Asia, and apple crumble from the UK.

...Special: Retired swimmer Liz Johnson serves up some of her personal favourites, on a night featuring fishy goings-on, bonding over leftovers and a kazoo competition.

Time Share: Doug and Carrie befriend their annoying neighbours to get a free holiday. Arthur develops a nasty rash.

Where's Poppa?: Doug tries to palm Arthur off onto his cousin for a while.

All I Want for Christmas: All Ray wants for Christmas is a little loving from his wife, but they can't get any privacy.

Civil War: Ray volunteers for a Battle of Gettysburg re-enactment to spend some quality time with his father - but it turns out that they're fighting on opposite sides.

The Crepes of Wrath: Bart goes on a foreign exchange to France, where he stays with a couple of slave-driving wine makers.

Krusty Gets Busted: When Krusty is accused of robbing the Kwik-E-Mart, Bart and Lisa set out to prove his innocence.

Some Enchanted Evening: Bart becomes convinced that his childminder is the Babysitter Bandit.

Bart's Comet: After pulling a prank on Principal Skinner, Bart's punishment is to help him with his amateur astronomy. But he accidentally finds a comet bound for Springfield.

Homie the Clown: Heavily in debt to Fat Tony, Krusty agrees to set up a clown college and Homer can't resist the opportunity to change career.

Bart vs Australia: When Bart's prank phone call damages Australian-American relations, he must travel down under to receive his punishment.

Homer vs. Patty and Selma: Homer has to ask Patty and Selma for a loan after making a foolish decision about the family's pumpkin investment.

A Star Is Burns: At Springfield's new film festival, Barney's haunting movie meditation on his alcoholism is on course to win, until Homer gets involved..

(2018) Oscar-winning animated superhero adventure with the voices of Shameik Moore, Kathryn Hahn and Nicolas Cage. Can a gang of Spider-heroes save the universe from reality-bending chaos.

The B&B battle begins at the Mayfield Hotel in Seaburn, Sunderland. There's cause for applause when a seal makes an appearance, but some guests get picky about the paintwork.

The B&Bers descend on Gateshead for the week's second visit, at Sutherlands Hotel, where two guests want revenge and are determined to dig up some dirt.

Visit three is to Hugh and Loretta's Brampton Dales Farm in Lincolnshire. After an afternoon out at an old jail, the B&Bers feel sheepish about an uninvited guest at breakfast.

The week's last visit is to Valley View in Pendle, Lancashire where sisters Sharon and Deby hope the B&Bers get onboard with glamping. But one guest thinks his pod is like a student flat..

It's payment day, and after a competition full of controversial comments and divisive opinions, the B&Bers have plenty of scores to settle. But who's won the week.

In Swansea, Laura and Tim take on a derelict cottage that's letting the whole neighbourhood down. Can a boutique bathroom and stunning bedroom transform their eyesore of a home.

...for Stand Up To Cancer: AJ Odudu, Gemma Collins, Jessica Hynes and Tim Key make sandwich cakes and a classic tart, and relive their earliest childhood memories in choux.

Channel 4's flagship news programme. Including the weather.

...of the World: Bettany explores a mosaic of cultures on Bulgaria's Black Sea coast, from fire rituals to gold treasure, the goddess Nemesis, communist relics and painted brides.

...Baker: The remaining hopefuls host a farm visit for school children and look after the ewes around the clock in lambing season. Who'll be top of the class.

It's 50 years since ABBA won the Eurovision Song Contest: a good time to look back at one of pop's big bang events and the story of Swedish pop since - from Europe to Roxette and Robyn.

(2018) Third-ager rom-com with Diane Keaton, Jane Fonda, Candice Bergen and Mary Steenburgen. What happens when a group of older women read 50 Shades of Grey at book club? Strong language.

(1997) Sci-fi horror. A spaceship re-appears crewless after being lost for many years. And it really takes against the team who are sent to investigate it. Bloody violence/strong language.

Gordon Ramsay visits Angler's Lodge in Idaho, a stunning venue whose owners have been struck by family tragedy. Can he rescue the broken business? [SL.

In Worcester, Mike and Lisa serve dishes inspired by their upcoming wedding in Italy. Linda and Steve plan a homemade menu. And married couple Paul and Paul take a risk: will it pay off? [SL.

Million Dollar Abie: Grampa costs Springfield the chance of getting a major football team. So he starts a new life as a bullfighter.

Grace Black is back! Meanwhile, Darren puts his daughter first, Kitty's past catches up with her, Freddie's love life lands him in trouble, and John Paul questions Lucas' homophobic views. [SL.

Art House: Arthur moves out after an argument with Doug, but can he maintain his independence.

Maybe Baby: Doug tries to convince Carrie that they should start a family.

Mia Famiglia: Ray's oldest living relative, his great aunt Sarina, turns up from Italy to help Ally with a school project about family trees.

Marie's Meatballs: Ray asks Marie to teach Debra how to make her famous meatballs, to cure his wife's culinary inferiority complex. But Ray's plan has consequences..

The Checkbook: Ray runs into money trouble when he takes over the family finances to show Debra how easy it is.

Brawl in the Family: The Simpsons have a fight when a game of Monopoly goes wrong, and Maggie has to call the police.

Half-Decent Proposal: Marge's incredibly rich high school prom date Artie makes Homer and Marge an indecent proposal they can't afford to turn down.

Tim Lovejoy and Simon Rimmer host the food and chat show, with guests Josh Widdicombe, Sue Perkins, Sophie Thompson and Jason Fox. Plus: live music from Jess Glynne.

Lisa's Wedding: A fortune-teller reveals that Lisa will fall for upper-crust English gent Hugh Parkfield at a prestigious university. But will he approve of her family.

Two Dozen and One Greyhounds: Santa's Little Helper fathers a huge litter of puppies, so Mr Burns offers them a home. But Burns has always fancied a greyhound-fur tuxedo..

The PTA Disbands: Bart's over the moon when the teachers go on strike, but Lisa starts to go mad. And then the governors draft in the parents to teach..

...List It: Brilliant Builds: Kirstie and Phil look back at Susan and John's Rushden renovation. Did they get the social hub they wanted without losing any of their home's cherished charm.

(1995) Romantic drama based on Arthurian legend, starring Richard Gere, Sean Connery and Julia Ormond. Can nomadic swordsman Lancelot contain his love for King Arthur's fiancée.

Colin and Richard have been holidaying in Playa del Inglés on Gran Canaria for over 20 years, and now want to buy a holiday home there. Jean Johansson shows them what their £200k can buy.

The new series concludes. Robert discovers that he's the heir to his long-lost cousin's run-down home in a prime London location. But he might not be the only beneficiary..

Channel 4's flagship news programme. Including the weather.

...Brands: With the supermarkets' own-label products selling more than ever, Denise Van Outen reveals the truth behind this budget-friendly industry. Who really makes these own-brands.

...for Stand Up To Cancer: David Schwimmer, Jesy Nelson, Rose Matafeo and Tom Davis make savoury pies and fiddly French confection, and recreate their most epic fail in meringue.

Claudia Winkleman, Mika and Lang Lang return for a brand-new search to unearth more of the UK's most exciting amateur pianists, starting at Manchester Piccadilly station.

As the new series continues, what did the Goggleboxers make of this week's top TV.

...an Artist: The definitive George Michael story. Stevie Wonder, Stephen Fry and many more celebrate George's exceptional artistry and explore the cost of superstardom.

Gordon Ramsay visits New Jersey to rescue Italian restaurant Leone's. Rose had built a thriving business, but when she spent two years in hospital, her son ran it into the ground.

North East. Clothes shop owner Lee hopes to impress her guests with an evening dedicated to her favourite food. But will her not-so-Greek salad and make-your-own wine be a hit.

North East. Hairdresser Simon hopes his tried-and-tested menu can bag him the grand. But will a disappointing dessert and some dodgy dinner table discussions ruin his chances.

North East. Nurse Sophie hopes to unleash her guests' inner children with her kids' party theme. There's a sauce squabble, and one guest uses a spoon to eat their burger.

North East. Sexual health nurse Jade throws a Wild West-themed party in a bid to rope herself the money. But can she serve a remotely edible dessert.

North East. Emergency planner James serves up a carefully constructed menu. But as his guests reveal their true feelings, will his effort-to-reward ratio pay off.

In south west London, Kevin McCloud meets Justin, who's restoring a neo-Gothic cemetery keeper's lodge and converting its toilet into a luxury ground-floor extension with a moat and pool. [SL.

In Edinburgh, Phil Spencer helps Zoe and Jason, who have an extensive wish list, and Kirstie Allsopp balances Stephanie and Tana's desires for a countryside feel and a city vibe.

Tim Lovejoy and Simon Rimmer chat to actor and comedian Jason Sudeikis, in a highlight from Sunday Brunch.

Colin Murray and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. Les Dennis joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner.

Same Old Song and Dick: Dick tries to put the magic back in his relationship, but soon learns the difference between being in a rut and being comfortable.

I Brake for Dick: Dick feels guilty after running over a chipmunk in his car, so he becomes an animal rights activist to make amends.

Dick Behaving Badly: When the family tell Dick that he is henpecked by Mary Albright, he asks Harry to help him become his own man. Sally and Tommy have a Monopoly showdown.

The Ride-Along: Ray is bored when he goes for a ride in Robert's police car, but his disinterest is soon replaced by terror when they get caught in a hold-up.

The Family Bed: Ally is constantly getting into bed with her parents, complaining about monsters in her room. Sleep-deprived Ray tries everything to solve the problem.

Good Girls: Debra discovers that her mother-in-law prefers Robert's girlfriend solely on the basis that she is a 'good girl', making Debra wonder what exactly a 'good girl' is.

Taps at the Montana: Niles wants his apartment back, but he must face up to both the snooty neighbours who think he is a menace and the person who is renting from him.

IQ: Who has the most impressive IQ - Frasier or Niles? The results of their childhood tests are finally revealed, and one is much higher than the other.

Dr Nora: Venomous radio therapist Dr Nora (guest star Christine Baranski) joins Frasier at KACL.

Vets and volunteers rescue and rehabilitate animals in South Africa. Harriet searches for a partially blind and injured bull elephant. Emily and Annie track down a roan antelope.

Channel 4's midday news summary.

In Alicante, the Rodriguez sisters embark on an emotional search with Richard and Leesa, while the Browns attempt to crack a complex property search in Murcia with Jane and Alan.

Henry Cole and Simon O'Brien look for profit potential in some church organ pipes and old leather sports car seats.

Colin Murray and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. John Virgo joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner.

The show that brings the sun to our sofas returns for a new run. Jasmine Harman helps Keith and Heidi look for their dream holiday home in Alicante for their budget of £170k.

New series that meets people who call our canal network home. Paul and Chris take their floating pizzeria through the Peaks, while solo boater Emma embarks on an epic adventure.

Angela and Steve upcycle a champagne bowl into a basin, to create a toilet in one of their turrets. Alison and Zion visit two contrasting chateaux as they search for a new home.

The new run continues. In Devon, married couple Lewis and James kick off the week with their signature style. But a dribbly shower rains on their chances.

Whistler's Father: Maggie reveals a hidden talent and Grampa tries to exploit it. Marge gets a job as a decorator for the mob.

Channel 4's flagship news programme. Including the weather.

Jamie Oliver takes us on a delicious journey, as he re-awakens the kitchen garden after winter. He celebrates rhubarb in a lip-smacking sauce and heroes spinach in a silky risotto.

...Star: In 2003, a shocking British TV series firebombs the life of beautiful model Miriam Rivera as six young men join a dating show 'with a twist', with disastrous consequences.

...Detectives: The Digital Forensics Unit use groundbreaking tools to track suspects' digital footprints when a 13-year-old is murdered in a Reading park.

In the centre of Brighton, a lone officer is violently attacked and urgently needs back-up. And a disorientated drunk going home to bed tries to smash his way into the wrong house.

Black Girls Matter: Documentary. As other major public figures fall from grace, women's groups take aim against Kelly. Is the star's time finally up.

Gordon checks in to the Vienna Inn, an Austrian-themed hotel and restaurant in Southbridge, Massachusetts, where business isn't what it used to be. Can he keep their doors open? [SL.

Homer's Barbershop Quartet: Homer reminisces about the Be Sharps, the barbershop quartet he was in with Barney, Apu and Principal Skinner. Guest starring George Harrison.

Weekend at Burnsie's: Dr Hibbert puts Homer on medicinal marijuana after he's attacked by a murder of crows.

In East Sussex, Freddy and Anita serve up a Ghanaian menu, but the cow's feet and tripe are too much for Peter and Lisa to swallow. Will Jess and Martin's burgers and jelly fare any better? [SL.

Simon and Lauren want to convert a tiny 150-year-old church near Sydney into their dream home. Can they honour its history while creating a modern house.

In Sheffield, Kirstie Allsopp's with Lois and Ahmed, who've already lost out on eight houses, while Phil Spencer helps Liz and Luke find a doer-upper that gives them 'the feel'.

Can woodland walks and sand sculpting impress our camping critics at the family-friendly rural retreat of Longthorns Farm, as they search for the Jurassic Coast's perfect pitch.

Kirstie Allsopp shows us how to create beautiful crafts with items we already own. In this episode, Kirstie turns trash into treasure with Mexican tin art, soap recycling and a tin can dog.

Colin Murray and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. John Virgo joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner.

Dickmalion: Mary Albright is irked when the cream of Rutherford society don't accept her. But when Dick makes the cut, he discovers the high life isn't all it's cracked up to be.

Sensitive Dick: Dick is forced to take special training after he comes down too hard on his students and they complain about him. Harry escorts Vicki to her high school reunion.

Will Work for Dick: When an insulted Nina has had enough and quits, Harry becomes secretary to Dick and Mary Albright. Meanwhile, Sally decides she wants to experience childhood.

T-Ball: Debra is upset when Ray fails to back her up in an argument with a competitive parent about 'unapproved' pretzels at Ally's little league game.

Traffic School: Robert's traffic school students are so bored with his class that he is driven to practise his delivery on his family, who prove to be even tougher critics.

Six Feet Under: Ray becomes concerned with his own mortality when he discovers that he has shrunk a quarter of an inch and is no longer six feet tall.

When a Man Loves Two Women: Frasier dates Cassandra, with whom he had a confusing time on Valentine's Day. Then he bumps into Faye and decides to date her too.

Visions of Daphne: Daphne gets engaged to her boyfriend Donny but then has a psychic vision that suggests he isn't the right man for her.

Shutout in Seattle (Part 1/2): Daphne's engagement to Donny upsets Niles, but Peppy from Café Nervosa provides a pick-me-up. Frasier keeps getting Faye's name wrong.

Vets and volunteers rescue and rehabilitate animals in South Africa. Emily needs to move three rhinos to a new home, and Becky's on a mission to save eight badly poisoned vultures.

Channel 4's midday news summary.

In Alicante, the Rodriguez sisters are on a mission to make holiday home dreams come true for Julie. In Málaga, the Hamiltons help Mike and Eva find the perfect place by the sea.

Henry Cole calls in a safe-cracker to bring a safe back from the scrapheap, and a ship's wheel is left in splinters when Henry falls out with restorer Guy.

Colin Murray and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. John Virgo joins Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner.

The new run continues. Martin and Mandy want to make the permanent move to Mayenne in France. Can Jean Johansson find them, their three motorbikes and two parrots a forever home for £50k.

The new series continues. Carrie and her dog Winnie begin their new life on the water but will their new sofa fit in their narrowboat? And Emma's boat springs a leak.

Angela and Steve continue to renovate their Monet suite, but the problems keep coming. At Château Les Rosieres, Amy and Marc start to reinstate a medieval well in their garden.

The new run continues. Last time out, Sally and Jo set up some spotless expectations for their B&B in Cornwall. At feedback time, they might end up wishing they'd kept their mouths shut.

Treehouse of Horror XXVIII: The Simpsons become Halloween candy, Maggie needs an exorcism, and Homer discovers the most delicious food of all.

Channel 4's flagship news programme. Including the weather.

Aldi are looking for the next world-food sensation. Will it be Filipino ketchup? Jackfruit mutton? Nigerian puff puff - 'like donuts, but better' - or fiery soul food love dust.

...Star: In the summer of 2003, the dating show with a twist reaches a controversial climax as Miriam reveals her 'secret'. Her family talk about her troubled past growing up trans.

A vehicle-stop turns into a high-speed chase. Officers meet fierce resistance from a woman accused of stalking. And a drunken reveller has broken a security guard's finger.

The coppers with tiny choppers head up the hunt for a man who assaulted an officer. And in the dead of night, a motorbike thief is hiding in a wood - can the drone flush him out.